TTG and RoTH Bloopers, Missing Scenes, etc
by Sketch
Summary: For those who've read my stories, Through the Glass and Reflections of the Heart, here are the bloopers and funny extras I promised. Give me ideas for more chapters!
1. Dante, the Gate Guardian

Bloopers/ Scenes That Didn't Make The Cut

  


_As per request, I'm doing a stupid collection of bloopers and scenes 'cut' from the story. I am doing this because I have to have some comedy in my stories, and the next two have ZIPPO. Therefore, anything you read in here is whatever I can think of that might be fun to warp in my stories. The first thing is a 'cut scene', however, I'll be going back, looking for blooper opportunities later. This WILL NOT be updated often, as I have few ideas for this. If you know something you'd like to see here, let me know, and I'll try to write it. Enough ANs. Enjoy the show, review, email me, you know the drill. _

  
  


  


_~RotH, between the last chapter and epilogue 2.~_

  


Dilandau looked around the place, shivering as the souls of the dead passed by and through him. Hell, was he glad to be getting out of ....Hell. He felt the warm glow in his pocket which had magically appeared in his armor after his death, and decided that dying was not a fun process to go through. Especially if you were *supposed* to be alive.

Scowling, he pushed through the crowds of people all making a steady line to... somewhere. He didn't want to find out yet. Ahead of him lay the vast gates of the Dead, where all souls entered and none returned. Well, none save for him. He _was_ Dilandau Albatou, afterall.

The gates themselves had been hewn from great slabs of black stone, skulls and skeletons moaning in silent agony as demons ripped through the souls carved above the large doors. It was a piece of utmost horror and supposed to instill fear amidst all those who traveled the path of the dead. The souls of those gone stole glimpses of the gruesome portal before shuddering into their vegetative state of walking.

Dilandau found himself rather liking the piece- it wasn't something you'd want decorating your bedroom door's frame, but put in full view of the public by placing it around your front door to ward off any fools who came to call would be an excellent location. When he got back, he'd have to commission someone to make a copy.

He stepped to the large door, nearing the exit with each quick pace. He could almost feel the heat returning to him, feel his body claiming him back, feel Celena's arms around his middle-

Looking down, he found that not only was it NOT Celena hugging him around the waist, the young boy who stood before him was also in his way. The young boy's face lacked the stoned look of the souls passing by them; the little brat had the nerve to scowl at him! Dilandau growled at the twerp, determined to put him in his place.

"Move munchkin. I'm going back." He tried shifting the brat to the side by grabbing the back of his collar, but the runt was remarkably heavy for his size. Dilandau stared down at the boy for a moment, then burst into hysterical laughter.

"Gods! Don't tell me YOU'RE the Gate Keeper!!" He circled the boy, poking here and there to see if the kid was for real or not. The boy's eyebrow twitched as he was prodded here and there, then at last his patience ran out. Making an oversized hammer appear out of nowhere in true anime style, of course he hit Dilandau over the head, knocking our dashing hero to the ground and out of the realm of consciousness for a bit. When he came to, the little punk was glaring down at him, hammer ready and chest puffed out.

"I am Dante, the Keeper of the Gates of the Dead, mighty shinigami* and Master Riddller!! None are allowed to pass without answering my questions three!!" Dilandau groaned unhappily as he got to his feet, wincing as he rubbed the back of his head.

"The Hell I do! I'm guaranteed another go- I got my wish granted and I got a "Get out of Hell Free" card from that dead Priestess chick. See, look." He rummaged through his magical pocket, trying to find the aforementioned card, then pulled it out after a moment's search. The young boy looked at the card with a scrutinizing gaze, absorbing the details of the cartoonesque man jumping out of a cage engulfed by flames and surrounded by small devils. Dante frowned, looking at the card several times.

"Well.... it does seem to be genuine...." Dilandau snorted impatiently, triumph gleaming in his eyes.

"Of course it's genuine, you little brat! I was given a pardon by the Gods!" The gate keeper sulked unhappily at this.

"I don't see why.. I read your record, and you're a big dork!" Dilandau snarled at this comment, but the boy went on, upset.

"I'm way older than you too, so stop calling me runt and kid and stuff!! I could just pretend I didn't know it was real, and then force you back through the gate! Or I could tear it up and not let you pass at all, so nyaaaah!!" The kid stuck out his tongue to show just how very old and mature he was, before continuing his tirade.

"I'm not gonna let you pass until you ask me nicely, you big dummy! Say please, and I'll let you go." Dilandau growled at this idea. Dilandau Albatou did NOT say please to little snot-nosed runts. He snarled, advancing on the brat.

"I'm supposed to be alive again, right now. If you don't get your skinny ass out of the way NOW, punk, I'll file a complaint with your boss. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going back so I can start making mad hot kinky love with- CHESTA???" Dilandau's gaze widened as the boy appeared through the gate, followed by several other familiar faces.

"Dalet? Viole? Jajuka? Maverick?" The young God of Death shook his head condescendingly.

"You'll feel like crap when you're first rejuvenated, unless your stamina is inhuman. But, all of them at once? You really do like it kink-"

"YOU KEEP OUT OF THIS, YOU... YOU.... YOU!!!" Dilandau turned his attention back to the five men standing before him, anxious looks on their faces. Without further ado, Dilandau went up and slapped each one of them.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING, DYING AGAIN?? DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO BE CAREFUL?? DIDN'T CELENA WARN YOU TO KEEP SAFE??? WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED????" A young voice interjected the answer in his tirade.

"They got in a fight with a falling down mountain, and lost badly. You wouldn't know anything about it, now would you? Anyway, say your goodbyes now, because they've got a long road ahead of them." Dilandau turned on the boy who'd dared interrupt his ranting, scowling.

"They're not going anywhere except with me! They're going to be revived too, so get out of the way, you little prick!" Dilandau tried shoving the boys through the portal, only to find them being repelled back by a no-longer-tiny God of Death Dante. 

The boy, er, demon, was now over twenty feet tall, and had grown an impressive set of bat wings to go with his glowing red eyes. Dilandau twitched slightly as Beast Boy roared above them. _Oh goody, he grew fangs too_, was Dilandau's only thought.

"I AM NOT GOING TO LET THEM THROUGH WITHOUT ANSWERING MY RIDDLES! THIS IS THE WAY OF DEATH AND...DEATH! NOW, PUNY MORTALS, ANSWER MY FIRST QUESTION, SO THAT YOU MIGHT RETURN TO THE LAND OF THE LIVING! FIRST, WHAT IS RED AND HOT???" 

Silence filled the-umm, whatever you want to call the void. It also overcame the group as they wondered what in the hell kind of question that was. Dilandau snapped angrily,

"Fire, stupid! What kind of morons do you take us for?" Dante roared again, outrage in his booming voice.

"YOU THINK THAT WAS AN EASY QUESTION, MORTAL?? I WAS SIMPLY TESTING YOU, TO SEE IF YOU WERE UP TO THE CHALLENGE! LET US SEE HOW YOU FARE WITH MY SECOND RIDDLE! QUESTION TWO; DO GODS REALLY EXIST??" Again, silence greeted him. This time, however, it was Maverick who spoke up.

"Umm, no offense or anything, but that's a retarded question."

"YOU DARE INSULT MY RIDDLE?? WHY IS IT_ RETARDED _AS YOU PUT IT, SMALL CREATURE???" Maverick cleared his throat to speak, but Dalet cut it off.

"Because you said yourself that you were a shinigami- a God of Death ! If the Gods do not exist, then you would not exist, because you yourself are a God. By saying they do not exist, you deny your own very existence! By your own argument, you wouldn't exist! The answer is yes, they do, but you need to come up with something more intelligent than that." Some of the souls had stopped walking on their trip to watch the amusing scene, and were cheering the boys on with lively- well, as lively as they could muster, being dead and all- cheers. 

Dante stood stone still, contemplating this fact for several minutes. Finally, he gave up trying to figure out what on earth the puny human had meant, and shouted for silence once more.

"YOU THINK YOU'RE SO SMART, HUMANS, BUT YOU HAVE YET TO ANSWER MY THIRD AND FINAL QUESTION!! ANSWER IT, AND I WILL REVIVE THE SIX OF YOU. GET IT WRONG, AND THE FIVE WHO JOINED THE ALBINO FOOL WILL ALL BE SENT ON!!" Dilandau shouted up at the boy, growing weary of the farcical scene.

"Just ask your damned question already!" The giant being smirked, victory already gleaming in his eyes.

"HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE-ROLL POP??" 

The question echoed about the vast nothingness, so still was the company of souls. Mutterings then started, one looking to the other and shaking their head. No one had any idea. Dilandau frowned, glaring at the beaming behemoth. 

"What the fuck is a 'Tootsie-roll pop'?? How are we supposed to answer the question when we don't know what the hell you're talking about??" The large God of Death grinned maliciously.

"IS THAT YOUR ANSWER THEN??" Dilandau shouted back at him.

"WE CAN'T GIVE YOU A BLOODY ANSWER IF WE HAVEN'T GOT A CLUE AS TO WHAT YOU SPEAK OF, PEON!" The giant roared with laughter, sending the wayward souls back to their paths of the dead. A puff of green smoke, and the small boy was dancing in front of them, glee on his face.

"I won I won I won and you lost, you big dork! Say goodbye to your friends, 'cause they're going down the march of the dead!!" Dilandau stood in front of his men protectively.

"You will not send them anywhere but with me, back to the realm of the living! Now move aside!!" 

"Hey, you can't take them you- HEY!!" The boy was kicking furiously at the General's shins, however, seeing as Dilandau had them clad in armor, the Destructive Demon's tactics were ineffective. Dilandau could not get past, however, due to the fact that the boy was blocking the gate and could not be moved by any force. Fists, feet and insults flew in the air, both in a fury. Neither would give footing to the other.

Watching the two shouting at each other, going for each other's throats, and overall trying to annihilate the other, Jajuka shook his shaggy head, sighing.

"I believe we should wait until they are both through before going anywhere near either one of them..." The four boys' heads nodded in agreement, and they say back to wait for the strom to subside.

  
  
  
  


~One Month Later~

  
  


"-AND YOUR MOTHER WAS A BEARDED DRAGON!!" The small gate-keeper growled defiantly after giving the insult, getting up on tiptoes to try to intimidate the taller man.

"AT LEAST MY MOTHER MADE SURE THAT I WOULDN'T BE STUCK GUARDING A DINKY LITTLE PICKET GATE BEFORE I REACHED PUBERTY!!" 

Dilandau then found himself twenty feet above the ground, legs dangling as he'd been lifted up for the umpteenth time that.... "day." Off to the right of the 'ferocious battle' Dalet was sure that victory was at hand. Looking over to Maverick, he grinned slyly.

"Have any ones?" Maverick shouted angrily as he slammed his cards down in front of him.

"Dammit, Dalet, you cheated!! No one wins forty six times in a row without cheating or a system!!" Dalet grinned, shuffling the cards.

"It's beginners luck, I'm sure. Wanna go again?" Meverick grumbled something, but dutifully handed back the cards to Dalet. Viole sighed, tossing in his own hand to go see what the other two were about. Jajuka and Chesta had ignored their game, concentrating on something even more important; an escape.

Laughing happily, Chesta finished the last stroke, then stood, shaking hands with the much-taller dog-man.

"I think it'll work, Jajuka! They're flawless! I think that if we-"

"IT WASN'T A GODDAMMED FAIR QUESTION! YOU MADE UP THE TOOTSIE THING!! ADMIT IT! YOU CHEATED BECAUSE WE ANSWERED YOUR OTHER TWO QUESTIONS TOO EASILY!!"

"Had Dalet approach them, they might just wave him on. Dalet! Come here a sec!" The brunette looked up as he was slipping another ace into his deck, startled at the distraction.

"Can it wait? I'm winning here!" Maverick seized the cards, shoving them into a back pocket.

"Our game is done. I'm never playing with you again, Dalet. You put Migel and Gatti's sleight of hand tricks to shame. What is it, Chetsa?" They all ducked in unison as the large hammer Dante had been using several times flew off into the dark oblivion beyond the gate. They knew it'd return again at some point, but from the other direction, and it always headed directly to the kid. Chesta brought them over, and in low voices, told them what he and Jajuka had been perfecting.

"And now they're done, see? And since Maverick is ready to kill you anyway, Dalet, we've had a unanimous vote that you're going to be the one who goes over there. Give them to the demon, and we'll be right behind you if it works." Dalet's complaints were drowned out by the sounds of thrashing and more name calling as their commander and the young boy fought on. Maverick shook his head, bemused and somewhat disturbed.

"Sometimes I wonder why we follow him. He's obviously got several cracks upstairs." The battle behind them paused, and the crunching of footsteps on... Dark oblivion floor... approached Maverick. Dilandau gave his subordinate a quick smack, replying in a somewhat raspy voice,

"Because I'm your GENERAL, that's why, and I'm doing this for you, so shut up and let me get you out of here!" Maverick moaned from his position on the ground, the noise sounding affirmative and yet slightly resentful. Dilandau ignored it, going back to shout at the little speck that was blocking his way. Chesta prodded Dalet, handing over the prized items.

"Hurry, before they get worked up again!" Dalet gulped, and slowly walked forward, eyeing the warring parties with unease. Dilandau was drawing breath to scream at an equally angry Dante, neither giving the soldier a second glance.

"Erm..." Dilandau smacked Dalet without looking over.

"We're busy, stupid, can't you see that? Go wait over there until I've gotten this settled." Dalet gulped, rubbing his sore cheek unhappily before mustering the courage to speak again.

"B-But S-Sir!! While you were, um... Speaking to The Gate Keeper, Viole went to his superiors and got five more passes for the rest of us. So now, um... Mr Shinigami, Sir, you can reanimate us and let us go on our way... Please." Dante scowled down at Dalet, then poofed in his green smoke down to child size. Reaching up, he took the five cards Chesta and Jajuka had so meticulously worked on, studying each one carefully. He looked skeptical, bringing each one close to his face, intent on catching any flaw he saw.

It would come as no surprise, then, that he failed to notice his hammer hurtling back towards him at a break neck speed. It hit him in the head, but, being already dead and a demon to boot, simply knocked him out cold. Dilandau grinned ferociously, apparently haven gotten the last insult in before his enemy's demise. He turned to the four waiting off to the side, then grinned with an even more feral gleam in his eyes.

"Boys, let's go home!" One by one, they stepped over the unconscious form of Dante, Guardian of the Gate of the Dead, through the gate, and back into the realm of the living.

  
  
  


*Shinigami- "God of Death"

  


Yes, I DO realize Dante is the name of the kid in epilogue 1. I was thinking IF I wrote a continuation, it might be fun to have Celena adopt Dante like she did in E1, however, without Dilly's approval. After Dante 'let the boys go' without them having real passes, he got the pink slip and was reborn as a human kid as punishment. And who else does he get picked up by but none other than Celena... which Dilly, of course, is livid about. Haha, the things I make my characters go through.. *cackles maniacally*

  


Oh, and if you have any ideas for the bloopers "fic" so to speak, email me with them! I have no more ideas! HELP!

  



	2. Outtakes and Bloopers

Out-takes, Part Two!

  


_Fun times ahead, my friends. Well, at least I hope they are. I've finally gotten a hold of my muse again *points to person shackled to the computer chair* so we'll be working overtime to make up for the little trists he's been having with who knows who or what. *gives PyroPixie a glare* He's sorry for not helping me update anything lately, and wants to blame it on me and my school work. Don't believe him though, it's all him..._

_That being said, here are a couple of "scenes" we had to "retake" due to bloopers. Get some popcorn and enjoy the show! *prods PP to get back to work*_

  
  
  


_~~~~~Through the Glass, chapter 1~~~~~~~~~~~_

Celena Schezar sat bolt upright in bed, close to sobbing. She was a prisoner of the heavy blankets of the bed- they were entwined about her like a spider's web around a fly. She cried out again, freeing herself from the sheets that held her prisoner.The room around her was silent, soft moonlight coming through the window panes and playing on the floor as it danced with the tree branches. Her candle had burned out. She wiped her eyes and nose, trying to relax as she located the matches for her little candle. Though the maids didn't like it, she always had it lit- it helped her sleep. And Brother, not wanting to make her upset, indulged her simple request of a constant supply of the thick wax columns. She watched the wavering flame, already beginning to feel better. Brother would be in soon, he always came when she cried out during the night.

True to his routine, Allen burst through the door some moments later, hurrying into the room. Celena's cries stopped abruptly, her mouth falling open as he Nii-sama stood there in front of her. At last finding her voice, she screamed, covering her eyes and shouting obscenities.

"For Gods sakes, Allen!! At least put some pants on before you come in!!" Allen, now much more awake, looked down at himself. He flushed deeply before running out of the room, hands splayed across his backside in attempts to hide the evidence of him sleeping in the nude.

~~~~~~_Sometime before chapter 3 in TTG, deleted scene, take one~~~~~~~ _

Celena sat in front of her mirror, willing him to appear. She needed someone to talk to, someone who could understand her; Allen was being a prick and Gaddess was hiding from her again. But _he_ would talk to her... even if it was only to insult her, she could use his biting sarcasm and blunt honesty. She stared at the mirror, waiting for him to make his appearance.

She waited for over half an hour, growing worried as he didn't make his usual appearance. She looked around the room wildy, wondering if something was wrong. Then, she spotted it.

With a flush in her cheeks, Celena got up and moved to the back of her vanity, plugging in the cord that fell from the mirror's back. Dilandau's image immediately came into view, face red with anger.

"Where the Hell have you been?? I've been trying to get in touch with you for over an hour!!" He went on and on, shouting at her stupidity, until, finally fed up with him, she scooted her foot along the cord and pulled the plug out again. The mirror went blank, and she happily sighed, picking up her brush to primp. 

~~~~_Sometime before chapter 3 in TTG, deleted scene, take two~~~~_

Celena sat in front of her mirror, willing him to appear. She needed someone to talk to, someone who could understand her; Allen was being a prick and Gaddess was hiding from her again. But _he_ would talk to her... even if it was only to insult her, she could use his biting sarcasm and blunt honesty. She stared at the mirror, waiting for him to make his appearance.

Finally, the snowy white of his hair came into view, falling into his eyes. That smug look he always wore sharpened as he came into focus- obviously, he'd just done something he was particularly please about. He grinned somewhat lecherously at her, eyes sparkling as they traveled the length of her body. Celena sighed in exasperation, now even more irritated than before. She spoke to the man in her mirror with a slight edge to her voice.

"Emperor Dornkirk, would you please stop answering Dilandau's calls? If I have anything to say about Fate or the white dragon, I'll be sure to call you, alright? Can you please put Dilandau on now?"

~~~~~~~_TTG, chapter 7, take one~~~~~_

"Such a beautiful face. Maybe we should just tell Allen she died during the experiment, I think it might be easier than parting with this one." 

Dilandau awoke to an odd mixture of sensations: one of someone kissing him very gently on the lips, the other of having half of his life-force being drained from him. One he remembered quite vividly, and memories brought him to full attention. He roared in fury as he found himself strapped to a table, and tears choked his throat from forming coherent words. His mind raced, straining against bonds he knew he couldn't break in his weakened state, and thoughts hitting a barrier within his subconsciousness. He saw Celena on the other side, looking as though she slept peacefully, and a hint of a smile was on her lips as she had dreams within her dreamworld. But he could see that this was no state of sleep. Never had she looked so pale, never had she been deaf to his cries for her. 

He threw his weight against the barrier that separated them, in a frenzy as he saw her fading from view. The angelic look never leaving her face, parts of her visible, then gone. Dilandau shouted at her to awaken, to fight, to break free. She only sighed and flickered from his vision for a moment. He forced himself to break his thoughts from her, and opened his eyes again, looking through the haze of the room he was being held in. Although there were several sorcerers in the room, all watching him, Dilandau's mind was not on them. Rather, he was concentrating on the man still kissing him- the old geezer didn't seem to want to stop anytime soon, and Dilandau was NOT having fun. 

Struggling against both bonds and sorcerer, Dilandau attempted to shout for help. All he got out were a couple of mortified muffled sounds.

"MMMPHPHH!!! MMMMMPH! MPHH MMPH MMPH MMMMPH MMPH @#&*^#%$(^%(#&MMMMPH!!!!!"

The sorcerer simply chuckled, but fell over when the chair from off screen hit him in the head. Eyes swirling, the sorcerer was promptly kicked out the window by a very angry Celena.

"Hey! Get off my boyfriend you old douche bag!! Go molest some other pretty boy, Dilandau is MINE!" The other sorcerers were quick to follow their leader's suit, each being bodily thrown by a very irate Celena. Dilandau stared at her as she snorted and fixed her hair.

"Celena.. Umm... thank you, but aren't you supposed to be on another set?" She grinned at him happily, flouncing over to hug him on the stretcher he was still bound to.

"They didn't do the scene right, so I had to fix it! Besides, I was getting bored, laying there and doing nothing! I wanted to see you! And, since we're both here now, and I've locked the door behind me...." She grinned at him, and Dilandau sweat dropped, beginning to fear his girlfriend even more than the sorcerers. She looked at him in a way that did NOT make him feel comfortable, even as she unplugged the cameras and dimmed the lights....

Several hours later and some noises not printable in a PG spoof, Celena sauntered out of the room, saying Dilandau was ready to take the scene over again. 

Dilandau, for his part, said nothing, but had a rather goofy smile on his face when the camera crew got the lights up and working again.

  
  
  


~~~~~~~_TTG, chapter 9, deleted scene~~~~~~~~~_

  


Dilandau watched the sorcerer angrily, sucking on the finger he'd burned while deflecting a fireball from the old coot. Rusent was laughing at him, for Gods' sakes!! Throwing little balls of fire and making him burn his hand so that he couldn't fight back! His good hand tightened its grip on his sword, ready to chop off the sorcerer's head with one blow. The other man seemed to anticipate this though, and dodged as Dilandau swung wildly. Our handsome hero fell headlong into a tree, getting his sword stuck in the bark. As he tried to pull it free, Rusent watched him, bemused.

"I say, Dilandau, you seem to be in a bit of a bind... do you need some help?" He was by Dilandau's side in an instant, arms around the younger man as he easily withdrew the blade. Dilandau smacked him away, but not before something caught his attention. Stepping back a few paces, Dilandau looked at Rusent in shock.

"Did.... Did you just pinch my ass?" Rusent gave a girly giggle, winking and blowing a kiss to the albino. 

"It was just too good an opportunity to pass up! And it's such a cute ass.... Although leather does it more justice than what you're wearing..." Dilandau sweat dropped, backing up feeling extremely uncomfortable.

"And they say I'M crazy... Leave me alone, you adulterous creep!!" With that, Dilandau turned tail and ran-

Dilandau: Take that back! I would never leave a battle!! Not even if it was like that!!

SLS: Shut up, Dilandau. This is MY story, and to you, for now, I am GOD! Now get moving, puppet!!

Dilandau: GAAAHHHHH!!!!

*ahem* yes, Dilandau was running away from the sorcerer, but unfortunately found himself trapped all too quickly, between a rock and Rusent.

The sorcerer grinned triumphantly, starting to pull aside his cloak as he advanced on Dilandau. Dilandau held up his sword defiantly, but never got to swing. Rusent stopped less than a foot from him, odd expression on his face before his head slid off his body. Dilandau watched the twitching body in confusion and relief.

His savior stepped into sight, and Dilandau sighed, sheathing his own sword and kicking the head over to the man standing there.

"Dammit, that was close. Be quicker next time, stupid Magliss!!" Mryth lifted an elegant brow, even as he nudged the head with his boot.

"I'm not even supposed to make an appearance until the epilogue, Dilandau. Be happy I kame to help you. Now, why are you giving this to me?" He looked at the head with a slight sneer, which Dilandau mimicked perfectly.

"I don't know. SLS has some weird subplot that makes you need it. Lucky you. You want a doggy bag?" Mryth sighed, shaking his head and making the head float by his side. He threw a fire spell on the rest of the corpse, erasing all evidence of the sorcerer. Then, he turned to Dilandau, voice softly threatening.

"Dilandau.... if you speak of this to anyone, you WILL answer to me." With that, he turned and went back into the story plothole he had arrived through.

Dilandau wiped his brow and started back to where the women were, trying to figure out a story he could tell them to make them happy....

SLS- now you see why I couldn't post it... *puppy eyes* Mrythiepoo and Dilly-chan told me not to!!

Mryth- *wincing at nickname* ...

Dilandau- GAHH!! DON'T CALL ME DILLY!

  
  


~~~~~~~_RotH, chapter 7, deleted scene~~~~~~~~~_

  
  


"Dilandau, I didn't come here to chat idly. I want to clear up a few things with you, and make sure we're seeing things from the same side. I want to ask you several questions, but the trip was long and I'm tired, so I'll be brief. The various leaders of the northern countries have heard your proposal, but many are against it and refuse to be moved. Tomorrow, at the council, we will have to discuss the details and see if there is something that can be done. We have got to get things settled now, before we are over-run. The advisors to Folken will be in charge of-"

"Don't drag your own sister into this, Allen. She needs to know, what with you going off to play hero again, but she does not need to hear everything so soon. Can't you at least wait until after this feast thing is over? She'll have to know what you're doing eventually, and she's been looking forward to dancing, though Gods know why..." Allen sipped at his second glass, nodding.

"That is precisely what I was going to say. I need you to make sure that Celena is not present- I would do something myself, but she will not listen to me, and I know she will respect your wishes-"

"Allen, don't be stupid. She does what she wants, and only listens to others when it's in her best interests. You don't have to worry about her though. She's already planned the day out with Merle; they're going shopping again tomorrow. I believe they are going to try to outfit the entire force in something fashionable for this event. A waste of good resources, if you ask me, but it will serve your purposes well enough. You don't need to worry about her spoiling your plans." Allen shook his head as though to clear it, and drank again from his glass. They sat in silence for a few moments, both stewing over the meeting they would be attending the next day. Allen put his glass down first, then stretched to drive away sleep for a few more minutes.

"Actually, there was one last thing I want to know, before I go tonight..."

Dilandau raised an eyebrow, watching Allen closely. While the knight was never relaxed when he was nearby, he hadn't seen the older man this uptight since he'd made his first appearance since the war. Dilandau sipped at his own vino, after nodding for him to continue. Allen coughed, but he didn't look away.

"Have you slept with Celena?"

Sputtering on his vino, Dilandau coughed and hacked until tears came to his eyes, sure that Allen had finally gone mad. Allen, however, took it as a sign of guilt and affirmation. So, he began to speak of how he understood of a man's needs, and how it was hard to resist a beautiful woman. That, in times of war, when things were desperate, people did things they normally would not even think of doing. Dilandau simply sat amazed as Allen lectured him on the importance of practicing safe sex, and knowing that if you robbed a girl of her honor, you'd better be willing to pay for it later.

"Because, Dilandau, if I hear Celena say something like she's with family, or that you promised her something you did not intend to follow through with, or that you hurt her in anyway...." The light gleamed in Allen's eyes, and for a moment, Dilandau cringed under the look of the brother of his love-interest.

"I swear I will make you regret it." With that being said, the knight swiped the bottle and left, humming a tuneless melody as he left. Dilandau sat in his chair, seriously beginning to wonder if he really wanted Celena enough to marry into a family shared with Allen...

Dilandau- SLS! You made me all wussy and afraid!! COME BACK AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE AGAIN, ALLEN!!

SLS-*restraining Dilandau* hence why it was cut, Dilly-kins.. Here, have some vino and drink yourself into a stupor.

Dilandau -* grumbling, but takes bottle anyway*

  
  
  


~~~~~~~_RotH, chapter 7, take 1~~~~~~~~~_

  


"Lady Celena? May I have this next dance? Unless you were waiting for another, then I will not intrude." I found my self next dancing with Mryth, who, despite his odd foreign ways and accent, knew the dance very well. He told me that in his hometown, dancing was the way people would meet new acquaintances and entertain old friends. I couldn't help but wonder what their dances were like, and he was in the middle of telling me about them when he stopped, and released my hands. His eyes were unreadable, looking over my shoulder at someone behind me.

"I hate to break up this cheerful little scene, but your presence is required by King Van and Sir Allen. They said it's urgent." Mryth looked at Dilandau for several minutes, then nodded, kissing my hand briefly and then melting into the crowds, off to find Van and my brother. Dilandau watched him go, muttering under his breath.

"I can't believe you actually like him, Celena.. He's unsettling and strange." He shook his head, then started to leave. He didn't get two steps before I'd grabbed him and turned him to face me. He looked at me blankly. "What?"

"You, sir, have just robbed me of my dance partner. You must finish the song with me, as it is your duty to uphold my honor." He smirked at that, though he did take my hands.

"Your honor, hm? I thought I was already in charge of that." He laughed as I cuffed his shoulder, but we soon settled into the dance. A steady, if tedious, song from Anna's country, with few steps that required minimal to no thought to perform. Dilandau seemed somewhat distracted however, so when that song ended, I held onto his hand, even as he tried to leave. He gave me a puzzled look, but complied and stayed for the last song of the night. A strings piece, soft and drifting in and about the hall, putting a quiet content silence over the crowd. I caught a glimpse of Allen and Anna, dancing in their own little world, looking happy and oblivious to everything except each other.

The next thing I knew, I was on the floor, having tripped on my robes and twisting my ankle. To make matters worse, Dilandau toppled on top of me, landing in an awkward position- straddling my waist, although he didn't seem to mind. In fact, he had the gall to grin- that is, until Allen yanked him off of me, dragging him out of the room by the scruff of the neck, all the while shouting things about honor and chastity and decency not to lay on his little sister in the middle of the dance-floor, thank you very much!!

I winced as Dilandau was bodily taken from the room, then sighed in relief as Chesta seemed to be organizing a rescue party for their General. Anna walked up to me, eyes wide, smile bright.

"Celena! I'm surprised at you! I always thought of you more as a hide-behind-the-curtains kind of girl!! I must say, though, this was far more entertaining!!" As she giggled in that high-pitched, irritating squeal of hers, I once again reminded myself it was no lawful to kill family, even if the family was stupid, probably inbred, royal nincompoops who did nothing better than giggle like an idiot and attract the attention of men. 

In fact, I was itching to bring out the dagger I'd slipped into my gown for just the thing, but the shouts in the hall relaxed me as I knew Dilandau had been freed from my moronic brother. 

"Anna... I think I heard Allen calling you." Anna squealed happily again, and ran off into the hall. I sighed, waved apologetically to the royal couple, and straightened my skirts, waiting for my partner to return. Afterall, I _had_ placed my honor in him, and I'd be damned if he ran out on me! 

  
  
  
  
  


_~~~~~RotH, last ch, deleted scene~~~~~~~~~~~_

  


He paused once more at the hanger's door, although he did not turn again. He sighed, looking within his home.

If she would return to be his wife, he knew that it would take time for the scars to completely heal. He would do all in his power to make her happy, because he cared for her very much.

If she did not return, instead sending him word....He would accept her refusal, and still do what he could to ease her pain. Because no matter what she chose, he wanted her to be happy.

_And now,_ he thought,_ it is all up to her. She must take her own path, and discover its secrets and its wonders. She will look at all the paths she has taken before, and when she is ready, she will sit and decide where her fate lies. But, it will be her own choice. Her decision will be of her own determinations, of her own reflections of the heart._

The Emperor of Zaibach then resumed his walking, ready to start another day. 

That was when he ran into her, and all Hell broke lose. 

"What the Hell are you thinking??" He flinched, desperately wishing he'd paid more attention to his surroundings before coming this way. If he'd known _she'd_ be here... things wouldn't have had the chance to get ugly. Apparently, however, Fate hated him.

Eries glared at the silent monarch, accusation flaring in her eyes, tail flicking back and forth with a rage that she usually was able to hide in front of others. But when _her_ man was flirting with _another woman_, she didn't care about her "ice bitch princess" facade. Her eyes sparkled as she advanced upon him, inwardly sighing that it had to come to this. He backed up, knowing full well what it entailed when a cat-woman- even a halfblood like the princess- got _that_ look in her eyes. It meant there'd be blood. Not hers either. 

He managed a girly scream as he was dragged down the hall to a certain lady's quarters...

_sometime later_

She purred as he stroked her head, mussed as it was, and leaned into his touch with contentment. Folken, for his part, shifted somewhat uncomfortably, as not only had he been bitten- "_It's to show everyone that you're mine!!"-_ his wings had also chosen to explode from his back as he.. Umm... er, yes.. Well, he was lying on his back and therefore his wings, neck sore, and he had a sated kitty-woman lying on his stomach, growling at him. 

He knew it was really purring, but he wasn't in the best of moods. The woman whom he would have loved to have as a trophy wife had flown away several hours ago, and the woman above him had just claimed him without any consent.

He blushed as he thought back on their activities, then chided himself, because his actions had been more than enough to make it seem as though he wanted to marry the beautiful woman that was laying over him most comfortably. In fact, he'd better tell her right now that there would never be anything like this again, as he refused to be claimed in such a way. He opened his mouth to say so, but she looked up, voice a low rumbling purr. Damn, that was sexy!

"Folken.... Now that we've become mates...."

"Ahh.. About that-"

"If you piss me off, I'll be sure to show you something else of mine I've kept hidden from everyone else..." He couldn't help himself being intrigued.

"What would that be?"

"My claws." Her hand between them, her nails suddenly extended a good three inches, and Folken gulped. Eries relaxed her hand, then, burying her head into his shoulder.

"Now.. What were you going to say, Folken, love?" He thought long and hard about the sacrifice he'd be making- losing Celena to the gorgeous woman who was... Oh GODS, no, not again already.... 

Sighing inwardly at himself for being so weak to her wiley woman's ways, he simply answered her with a simple "Nothing, Dear" as she began to show him again why a cat girl was so much better than a regular human girl. 

_Short and stupid, ne? Ah well. It was fun for me at least- and it takes another thing off PP's list, ne, PyPix? *PP glares mournfully, rubbing at chafed fingers* Ignore him, he's just trying to get you to free him... Review, you know you read the fic if you're down here reading this, is it so friggin hard to go to the bottom left a little and type a few words? C'mon, I'll write your review for you, just copy and paste one of these phrases: _

_I love your stories, SLS! Please write more!!_

_ Gah, are you still writing this rubbish?? Go do your Homework! _

_ MOERO!! _

_ Who are you again? _

_What is TTG, RotH, and why are you so mean to Dilly? _

_I'm here with the Association for Mistreated Muses (AMM) we received a call about you- do you know a muse by the name of 'PyroPixie', by any chance?_

_See? Easy! Now, review! _  
  



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